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Anhedonia

by Alden Groves

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Mac
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about

People tend to think of depression in its most extreme form, where the person is crying, sad and unable to get out of bed, but that’s not always how it manifests. Often, when I’m depressed, I just can’t get excited about anything. I still need to do everything normally, but it feels inauthentic. It’s like I’m a robot.

lyrics

Brace yourself to be thrown away
Everything you’ve ever said is gonna go away
And there’s no way round it—no way
In a hurricane drown or you’ll blow away

You’ll blow away—you’ll blow away
I’mma take a bow
But for now I’ll stowaway
Stowaway—I stowaway
People up top talk like they know me

And god what a crock—shit is so lame
Better call Mark—what a story
But there’s no room left in the whole place
I’ll be checking out soon and it’s okay

It’s okay it’s okay
There’s not a way down—not a slow way
Not a slow way—not a slow way
There’s not a way down—not a slow way

Anhedonia—am I lifelike?
Anhedonia—it’s a lifestyle
Anhedonia—it’s a lifeline
Anhedonia

And if I fly right by post haste
It’s been coming down the pipeline—slowly
I’ve been running for a lifetime—lonely
Is there nothing that you types find holy?

Lying on the floor in the propane
Anybody got a light? Show me
Anybody got a life? Go live
Yeah I’mma be alright—no shit

I’m incompatible
I keep it numb and fanatical
I been undone in the catacombs
I been undone in the chemicals

You cannot fuck with my chemistry
You have become an impediment
I become Mr.Incredible
You become Mr.Untenable

I never thought of it
Miss me with all of it
That’s what the problem is
I never wanted this
I never wanted shit
I never wanted shit
I never wanted shit
Anhedonia

Anhedonia—am I lifelike?
Anhedonia—it’s a lifestyle
Anhedonia—it’s a lifeline
Anhedonia

They always fall in love with the mania
But they don’t wanna fuck with the change-up
No way up
And I turn away now—can’t say much

Say much—I can’t say much
I can wait it out but for now I stay put
I stay put—I stay put
People want a god but they’re not faithful
I’m sorry

Swear to god I wanna be playful
There’s a lot I gotta see change though
So for now I’m gonna lay low
And I can’t stand up so I stay floored

Stay floored—I stay floored
Can’t take it but I know I gotta take more

credits

released July 16, 2019

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Alden Groves Boulder, Colorado

Alden Groves is a singer, songwriter, producer, and multi-instrumentalist from Colrado. Taking influence from the Alt Rock and Trip-Hop scenes of the mid 00’s, they bring a modern sensibility and emotionality to every song. The Alden Groves sound is characterized by maximalist production, emotive performances, poignant lyricism, and a somber intensity that's as driving as it is heartfelt. ... more

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